Moving to a new country at the age of 30! For the first time
in my life leaving Jordan. I think I mainly passed through the following
stages:
Enthusiasm phase:
I came to Stockholm full of myself! Having had an intense
successful career that I left after co-founding
a successful social enterprise for four years. Becoming known in the
domain and sphere I worked with, gave me allot of confidence. I secretly
thought I have a valuable experience to offer to civil society and activists in
Sweden. Full of enthusiasm and confidence in myself after following my heart to
Sweden, I started an intense networking plan! Meeting everyone and anyone I
might have known in Sweden or I thought could find my experience and transition
of interest. My weekly calendar was full of one on ones! Moving from area to
area to meet people! People were mostly very nice and encouraging. Few were
honest enough to say it’s REALLY HARD to find a job in Sweden specially without
speaking Swedish language. At this phase
I even had thoughts of starting my own social enterprise in Sweden to do what I
have passion for. This phase made me realize how social I can be!
Summer phase:
I was surprised to find out that EVERYONE is OFF during
summer in Sweden. Summer meaning late June tell mid to end of August. In follow up for my spring enthusiasm phase, I
was sending follow up emails to all the people I met during spring. Getting
automatic responses of vacations! It felt like I’ve built in the wrong timing
and I would need to repeat things again. This phase made me appreciate slow
pace and just enjoying summer.
Lagom phase:
“Lagom” is a Swedish word that reflects allot about the culture.
It basically means just enough. In reality its an integral part of the culture
to do work just enough and not try to be the star, compete or excel. After the previous phases I totally adopted
the lagom culture. I wanted a job just enough to say I’m doing “some work” and
getting “some income”. I stopped applying to senior NGO posts and humbled my CV
to apply to coordinator jobs that could get me into an interview level. I can’t deny “lagom” for me is kind of
depression. It’s not my usual to not try hard or do my best to get things done
the most efficient and good way possible. I had huge fluctuations in my self-esteem
to an extent that my husband and I would talk about it as if it’s another
identity among us. How is your self-esteem today? And we would discuss it! I
had huge disappointments when I was let down for jobs I thought I fit well for!
REALITY check
Today, after a year and 3 months of moving to Sweden. Or
maybe after 8 months of living full time in Sweden, I finally got a part time
job in a great educational institution! I have more hope of future
possibilities! It just takes time!
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