صلصال

أعود لشغفي والهو في الطين
منذ اكثر من اربع اعوام لم المس الطين بالشغف الذي الاعبه اليوم
اعود طفلة
كالتي كانت تلهو بالطين في الحديقة
لتوبخ اخر الليل حين يسكن الصمت ويبقى صوت اندفاع الماء من الحنفية التي تركتها مفتوحة بعد ان شكلت مخلوقاتها
كنت اعلم كم يصعب نسيان الماء مندفعة في صحراء كهذه
وكان يصعب ان اقاوم ان امنح جفاف التراب الحياة بالماء
انا التي كنت وما زلت اعشق انسجام قطرات الماء بين حبات التراب
وعناق كل قطرة بكل ذرة
تلمسها، انسيابها، تشكيلها ، وحياتها
كنت اشكل الاوجه واضع الاحجار والاخشاب لتحل محل التفاصيل
وفي كل يوم
اعود الي بيتي
وانسى الماء مندفعة
وفي اخر الليل اوبخ مجددا
واضحك مجددا

اليوم احمل شغفي بين يدي وفي مخيلتي
واحبك لاجل هذا
لانك اخذتني الى لقاء مع روحي
احبك لكل فكرة صلصال تخلق في ذهني
كم يشبهنا الصلصال الذي يخلق في مخيلتي

صادقت العديد
واحيانا كنت اعيدهم الى ارواحهم
فيذهبون هناك
حيث لا اكون
وتنتهي الحكايا

تحملني كل يوم الى حيث احب ان اكون
تحملني لاشيائي الصغيرة
باحساس
واسئل نفسي كل يوم الاسئلة التي لطالما اخفضت صوتها

وكلما اقتربت من نفسي
من شغفي
من روحي
وبضع جنوني
اجدك هناك
اقرب الى قلبي

احلم بقصصنا القادمة التي سوف نتخيلها
ونمنحها الحياة بقطرات ارواحنا
ونشكلها بفرحنا ودموعنا
وكثير من لمسات احساسنا
فتشبهنا
ونعشقها

My awareness campaign!

It’s almost a year since I wrote allot of apologies…. And very weirdly I thought of rewriting that post on March 10th, the exact day I wrote it originally one year before…. I thought that many things have changed in my life, so when I returned to it, if found that it has been exactly a year and that was freaking weird to discover…. I was getting ready to travel, and my trip was a very busy one, I couldn’t get to write that post… here I am… waiting in JFK for my flight back… and I guess that’s the right time to rewrite that post… I’m returning with allot of new feelings… new thoughts of places and how to relate to them… a baggage filled with plans, dreams and aspirations… which I’m looking forward for …

Reading back my apologies felt like “That was Too Honest”! I guess I am on a totally different road now, I’m grateful I got my PMP, I’m grateful I followed my passion in my work, I’m grateful I learnt how to take time to just do nothing and enjoy having nothing as a priority on a weekend… I’m grateful that I’m almost done with my MBA, I’m so proud that what matters has differed to me, and that my priorities are clearer and that I spend my time doing something I believe in, with a place I can relate to and with real people… which is not necessary what others would feel important… so much has changed in a year, I’m certainly the same person, but I can see my soul reflected in my current life today more than any other day… I’m falling in love with this transformational phase… my priorities changed …and what matters to me now is not related to what used to matter previously…. It feels like a birthday post… I wonder if that post made it feel like a conscious accountability tool for me, or a motivator to do a real change… either way it has been very interesting and quick change in my life…. Not sure if I broke anyone’s heart! Not sure if I should apologize for that either… I know mine is almost healed and will soon be ready to fall again….

Done with Passion.... you can tell

It’s amazing how things done with passion immediately touches us. I’ve been noticing this for so long, but it has hit me recently more than ever by several initiatives or art which completely touches my soul, and I know for sure it must have meant allot to the person who did it for it to be able to still get out of that person’s heart and transform into a beautiful idea, product, or space. That can touch me! Where I am someone of no direct relation to that initiator, expect that we live in the same world !! I have three Ammani examples which recently are making me hopeful that there is still allot of hope in that there are so many people who wholeheartedly follow their passions…. And do what they feel like doing with allot of passion.. Nadine Othman is one of these people… her art work is done with allot of passion, she stares at each of the paintings she has done and tells her story and inspiration to that painting in a very passionate way…. You just love it.. her art work is very unique! Very expressive… touches you… you don’t have to be an artist to find out that she has done it with allot of passion.. that its real art…
Adraj is another example…. A unique space done with allot of effort and little resources down town Amman….. because these people tried passionately to make the space appealing for them, its appealing for anyone who enters it… when people create a space passionately that is comfortable for them anyone who enters that space would feel comfortable in it… even if you think its not your taste of furniture or designs, you can still feel it, it touches you, and you know those people did allot of effort in that place… you can easily tell…. It touches your soul….
Interruptions, the architecture publication is another example of things you feel its soul easily… this publication is obviously done with allot of passion too… I mean I have nothing to do with architecture except that I live in a house that’s probably designed by an architect, my best friend is a great architect, I like the word architecture, I hear the word “Tasleem” more than often, I get to read allot of architectural projects in my monthly subscribed PMI magazine, as its usually one of the case studies or feature articles to highlight project management practices… But I mean that’s about it… yet I enjoyed reading through this magazine… and I felt the passion of those who did it…..

So life feels very good when you get exposed to other people’s passions in your daily life…. When you attend a touching concert where musicians are completely involved and enjoying playing on stage… you just love it…. When you attend an art exhibit and you feel the shining eyes of the artist… and you know its not a business out there…. It’s a real passion…
Life remains interesting… I just love it…